The Incident

Sleeping peacefully."stop stop"I'm awaken to the screams of my mother beside me.  I begin to look around the bedroom.
Who is that? He looks familiar....

I focus and realize it's my father.

You see my mother and father have always had an interesting relationship. My father is abusive, controlling... He isn't a good person in general. They broke up a few months ago, we were Finally free!. Or so we thought.
"Oh god please no. Don't!" My mother screamed as she tried to push him away. I wish I could help. I wish I could do anything. As he ripped her clothes, forcing himself onto her. She looked in terror at me, as I watched. Watched her getting raped.
The look of pure sadness.

But what could I have done. I was 3.

The nightmares still haunt me.
It effects my relationships with men. With anyone.
But I couldn't have stopped it.

Its not my fault.